Dealing With Tantrums:
Simple & Effective Tools
Before you look at dealing with tantrums, be clear as to your goals to
bringing up your child. Handling tantrums can be very challenging but
using some of these strategies in dealing with child's temper tantrums
and the variety of prevention tools can help alleviate the stresses of
Mean what you say and follow through consistently and your child will
respond positively to better verbalize and handle feelings and
'Throwing a Tantrum'--toddlers first line of defense when frustrated.
Dealing With Tantrums
- physical removal of child
- take away privileges--no play time at the park, lego, movie etc
- make clear behavior expectations & clear behavior consequences
- use humor to interrupt the start of or continuation of a tantrum
- get them to smile--then you know their heart is right
- use different interrupts to help them change their state of mind
- use interrupts to distract them from their frustration fixations
- speak to toys saying "bye bye, see you next time" when in stores
- sing at home to put toys away into box or drawer
- shock interrupt with a splash of water from a water 'squirter'
- use breathing techniques & 10 counts before a full blown 'fit'
- lend a helping hand to catch & dispel rising frustrations
- go behind your toddler & redirect their behavior
Additional Tantrum Prevention Tools
- make sure child is well rested, well fed and clean
- have child centered activities to challenge them before nap time
- let them know the importance of their place in the family
- control the environment and amount of stimulus surrounding them
- keep rooms, play & work areas clean & tidy for your child to focus
- choose wisely when to shop & run errands during the day
- note any sicknesses or 'under the weather' conditions in your child
- check your busyness--how are you focusing on your child
- lower simple sugars--pop & fruit drinks affect blood sugar & ph
- know & study your child, making a book on each child
- learn the when & why of your child's temper tantrums
- quality time staying connected--try one on one 'date nights'
- acknowledge their feelings of anger and sadness
- give alternatives how to express and deal with their feelings
- look for desirable behavior instead of correcting their negatives
- Have a 'YES' day, stay at home at those 'tough times' of a day
- puppet show to role play tantrums & how the puppet deals with it
- positive 'redirect' substitutes "not the knife but the spoon is Ok"
- try saying "yes" more often than using "No"
- alternatives to "No", like stop sounds, "Whoa" or a horse neighing
Have fun with your toddler & don't let your life get too stressful especially when dealing with tantrums. Have fun rolling around with your toddler, have tickle fights, read a book on the couch, floor or under a tent with some popcorn or play a favorite game together. Relax, slow down and enjoy each other.
Children thrive and love to be given structure and routines for in the home, clearly laid out rules to follow in and out of home. Children will work diligently toward your expectations for their behavior when they know you will follow through on what you say & expect.
Enjoy working with your child to help them better express themselves. Use variety and be consistent when dealing with tantrums in each situation.
We love to sing "Now it's time to put away, put away, put away, Now it's time to put our toys away, until we play next time." This is a great strategy & works great for cleaning up toys. It provides structure, clear behavior expectations, builds a habit and a Pavlovian understanding in the child of what behavior they need to carry out cued by the singing.
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